The "Butt Sniffer"

That's me.


Let me clarify.


Today as I was teaching, I was walking around the room checking on my kids and their work. I started to smell something, which I determined to be pee. It smelled a lot like a wet diaper, which I know plenty about since I teach Sunday school to infants. It's weird that someone would pee in their pants and then not tell me so that they could get a change of clothes. I've already had 4 kids with accidents this year! I started trying to zero in on the source, and determined that it came from the "orange" table. So then I pretended to look for something on the ground while I bent down next to every child at the table and tried to sniff out the pee. That's what you get to do when you teach little kids...jealous?

I couldn't figure out where it came from! Then it was time for recess and, since it was my day to stay inside, I sent all of the other kids on their way except for the orange table. I explained what I was smelling and plead for honesty. No bite. I explained that no one was going to be in trouble, and that I just wanted to help them get cleaned up. No bite.

So then I finally released them to recess, but only after one more sniff. I think I might have smelled pee on one of them, but not strong enough for an accusation. While the kids were at recess, Cheri from the office came in to help me sniff out the offending odor. We even picked up chairs and sniffed them and smelled the floor! I could still not pinpoint the smell, although she did verify that it was definitely a pee smell. For the rest of the day, I smelled pee in my room. The source of the smell remains a mystery.

So then I was telling my story after school to someone and another teacher overheard. She jokingly said "The next thing we know you'll be on the news for touching butts." But then I matter-of-factly reassured her that I was not TOUCHING butts, just SNIFFING them. As soon as the words came out I realized that, if possible, that sounds even worse than touching butts.

We'll see what adventures tomorrow holds.